March 11, 2008

Perhaps the only alcoholic beverage with a marketing campaign aimed at drinking for medicinal purposes (“Guinness for Strength”) I spent one entire summer on a diet that consisted mainly of Guinness and sausages as I traveled throughout England and Ireland with my grandparents. And I can tell you – I never felt better. Which is either a testament to Guinness, or to my own personal fortitude and Irish genetics.

Now that I have the dual role of parent and employee, I can no longer stagger around the morning after St. Patrick’s Day – I have to be clear headed and well-rested. So, that led me on the search for Guinness at locations that won’t require a shuttle ride or a green tank top. You can follow the crowds to Mulligan’s or Dog and Duck, Moose McGillycuddy’s, Ale House, Sports Page or Life’s A Beach – you don’t need my help to find those party spots. I have searched out some locales that may not immediately come to mind when you think St. Patrick’s Day. While it saddens me to admit that I cannot participate in my usual raucous mid-March booze-fest, I can still sit and enjoy a pint (or three) in relative peace, and raise a glass to my grandfather’s memory.

But where should I head for a properly poured glass of heaven? I am picky. There is a correct way to serve Guinness, and if you screw it up and I catch you – well, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. My uncle owned a bar and bartending school, and I learned from the best. At a time in my life when, let’s say I was not making solid long-term plans, he offered to enroll me in his bartending course free of charge. It was an act of generosity and support, and also a bit of a homecoming. I spent many days and nights as a child tagging along with my father as he left his newspaper office and walked next door to his brother’s bar.
Billy Wilson’s was practically a historical landmark in that town, and when I found myself on the other side of that long wooden bar, I saw life from a new perspective. Pouring a proper Guinness was one
of our
lessons, and I embraced it. I was hired right out of high school to work at a newly opened bar in a neighboring town, and I made sure they had Guinness on tap. The supplier came in to show all the poor innocents (my new co-workers) how to get a Guinness from tap to table with the best possible results. And I only had to correct his technique once or twice.

Since moving to Maui, I have had Guinness in a number of locations, and this week I contacted the local distributor for a complete list of Guinness tap handles, so I could pass them on to you. Consider this my version of a Public Service Announcement. (You’re welcome).

Guinness is available three ways. Tap, Can and Bottle. If you cannot get to a tap, I suggest the can, as it is sort of a “kegger can”. They call it a Surger Unit, and basically, it comes out like a tap beer. Pretty awesome, I have to say. Bottles are available in lots of places – but if you have a choice, go for these special cans first.

On tap, Upcountry there is only one place to go – Casanova’s. Steven, don’t ever take this away from me, I might just cry. Having Guinness on tap within walking distance of my house is both very very good, and very very bad. It was definitely a selling point, I’ll say that. Guinness and pizza is basically a perfect meal, in my opinion, and thank goodness I can come by it easily. In Pa‘ia, the surger units are available at Moana Café, conveniently located around the corner from my office. And I promise you, that is just a wonderful coincidence.

In central Maui, Cary and Eddie’s Hideaway is a great mellow spot to hang out and enjoy your draft Guinness with a view. Surger Units can be found at AK’s Café and also at Unison in Wailuku, along with sushi and noodles – another yummy combination I highly recommend.

In South Maui, Guinness is more widely available on tap. Pizza Madness has Guinness on tap, and so does the brand new Ocean (next door to the Kihei movie theater), and Sansei sushi as well as Longhi’s at the Shops at Wailea and the Tiki Lounge. Good choices all, and perhaps not quite the madhouse that some of the more traditional pubs will be.

If you are reading this on the Westside, Blue Lagoon has a keg, and so does The Rusty Harpoon. They have surgers at Cool Cat Café across from the Banyan Tree, a perfect companion to their burgers.
And, for the weary traveler, they have Guinness on tap at the Maui Airport. One for the road.
Slainte, Grampa; Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Don’t drink and drive.

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Vanessa Ghantous